My insomnia is back. I lay there last night, with the clock ticking steadily to midnight, eyes bright, all systems go in my brain. I just couldn’t sleep.
I messaged my friend in England, who would just be getting up. She messaged me back, but not right away, so she must have been busy. Went onto Facebook: too late for Canadians to be active, too early for the Trinidadians to be active. Then what?
As I lay there, these thoughts swam lazily through my head:
- Why can’t I sleep?
Should I get up and empty the dishwasher?
- What am I making Kidlet for lunch for school?
- What should I do with my hair tomorrow?
- I’m hot.
- When will I be sharing my bed with a guy?
- What was that noise?
- I’m cold. Brrrrr…..
- What should I wear to the Justin Timberlake concert?
- I have really good friends.
- I miss Mummy.
- When am I going to get a j-o-b?
- I want a flatter stomach, but I don’t want to exercise. Do I want to start exercising?
- Naaaaah…I definitely don’t want to start exercising.
- Will I ever find love again?
- Is it going to be like this forever?
- What am I going to make for dinner tomorrow night?
- I’m hot again.
I then rolled over, played Candy Crush, and lost my 5 lives. I sighed. I fired up the tablet and played against the computer in Scrabble and lost all but 2 games. I looked at the clock:
I fired up YouTube and watched a few episodes of a comedy I followed a few years ago. With it playing in the background and lights from the screen flickering on my bedroom walls, I finally fell asleep.
Now I know why I can’t sleep at night:
I’m bored and lonely.