The REAL reason I can’t sleep at night

My insomnia is back. I lay there last night, with the clock ticking steadily to midnight, eyes bright, all systems go in my brain. I just couldn’t sleep.

I messaged my friend in England, who would just be getting up. She messaged me back, but not right away, so she must have been busy. Went onto Facebook: too late for Canadians to be active, too early for the Trinidadians to be active. Then what?

As I lay there, these thoughts swam lazily through my head:

  • Why can’t I sleep?
  • Should I get up and empty the dishwasher?
  • What am I making Kidlet for lunch for school?
  • What should I do with my hair tomorrow?
  • I’m hot.
  • When will I be sharing my bed with a guy?
  • What was that noise?
  • I’m cold. Brrrrr…..
  • What should I wear to the Justin Timberlake concert?
  • I have really good friends.
  • I miss Mummy.
  • When am I going to get a j-o-b?
  • I want a flatter stomach, but I don’t want to exercise. Do I want to start exercising?
  • Naaaaah…I definitely don’t want to start exercising.
  • Will I ever find love again?
  • Is it going to be like this forever?
  • What am I going to make for dinner tomorrow night?
  • I’m hot again.

I then rolled over, played Candy Crush, and lost my 5 lives. I sighed. I fired up the tablet and played against the computer in Scrabble and lost all but 2 games. I looked at the clock:

1.45 a.m.

I fired up YouTube and watched a few episodes of a comedy I followed a few years ago. With it playing in the background and lights from the screen flickering on my bedroom walls, I finally fell asleep.

Now I know why I can’t sleep at night:

I’m bored and lonely.

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